Marriage rules to live by:

The faces we'll give when one does something wrong

Dear Kgololosego (my future husband) here are the rules we need to live by when we get married.

1.       Put God first before everything.

Whoever loses faith in God must tithe for both partners at church until she/he awakens from the “prison of lost hope”

2.       Arguments are not doors for escaping.

No argument can make us feel like we don’t belong together. Couples fight all the time but the one that lasts is that which has both parties working hard for.

3.       There’s no “I’m tired” in love making

If one partner doesn’t want to make love due to being “tired” she/he should pay a R2000 fine to the other partner.

4.       We must celebrate our anniversary every year at a new place.

We should book double trips outside South Africa in a year if we don’t celebrate our anniversary.

5.       We don’t stop making love

Sex doesn’t have to stop as we grow older. If yours doesn’t wake up we buy Viagra and if mine doesn’t get wet we buy Lub.

6.       No one is a slave

We share chores until the kids are old enough to take over. Should any partner enslave the other, then 50 % of their assets should be shared with the other.

7.       No cheating!

Not open for discussion.

8.       No use of family money unnecessarily

Failure to comply simply means the partner who used the money shall not get pocket money until the money used is paid out.